Sunday, March 15, 2020

The Paradox of Attracting Romantic Relationships


There’s a paradox that exists when it comes to women and
dating. It’s all about how guys who DON’T necessarily WANT a relationship
sometimes end up attracting great women who want nothing more than to be with
them indefinitely.

I’ve noticed this interesting paradox over the course of
my dating life and watching my friends with their dating habits. It was a
strange phenomenon to watch.

The more a guy (myself included) wanted a loving, committed
relationship with a wonderful woman, the less potential mates I would meet. But
whenever I simply got into the “groove” of living my life, enjoying myself, and
working on personal development, opportunities for relationship bliss with
lovely women just seemed to pop up out of nowhere.

It’s a strange phenomenon, and it’s something that works
not only in your dating life, but in other areas of your life as well.

You may realize this yourself with some other area of
your life. Sometimes the more relaxed you are about trying to accomplish
something, the easier it is for you to bring it into reality.

I’m not talking about being lazy here, because putting in
the work to attain anything worthwhile IS a necessity. But what I want you to
think about is how your attitude plays a part in all of this.

Attitude is Everything

When it comes to dating and relating to women, your
attitude is everything. Guys who project an attitude of confidence and
independence are highly attractive to women because this signals that they’re
not needy.

If you project an attitude of neediness and anxiousness
to be in a relationship, you’ll scare quality women away because of your inner
desire to “fill some hole” in your life with her. You’re coming from a scarcity
mindset, and whether you’ve just met her or have been out with a woman a few
times, she’ll soon catch wind of your neediness and she’ll be out of your life
faster than you can say, “I can’t believe I’m going to die alone!”

Make no mistake; being anxious about anything will impede
its attainment.

Whether it’s a great romantic relationship with a
gorgeous young lady or that promotion that you want to land at work; an anxious
and needy attitude can and will repel the things you want the most.

A Word on Confidence

A lot of guys think that confidence is everything. Well,
confidence does play a major role in both getting a girlfriend AND keeping her
happy. But confidence is simply a part of the bigger picture.

That bigger picture, as I’ve said before, is your

You see, as I’ve already mentioned, a woman, the kind of
woman that you really want to be in a relationship with, wants to think that
she’s worthy of being in a
relationship with you. After she’s figured out that you’re worthy of her attention she actually wants to experience the
challenge of catching you and keeping you all to herself.

A smart man knows how to show just enough interest to
spark a woman’s interest in him, but he knows when to give her enough space so
that she has to do a bit of work to sustain his attention as well.

Now, I don’t believe in playing mind games with a woman,
but I do believe in the power of attraction. If you want to attract a great
girlfriend you’re going to have to learn how to keep her interested in pursuing
you. And the best way to achieve this is by projecting a detached attitude
towards romantic relationships, at first at least.

I know, it doesn’t make sense, but that’s the paradox.
The more detached you are from something, the more opportunities for its
attainment seem to occur.

If You Build it…She’ll Come

Let me keep this as simple as I possibly can…

If you work on becoming what women call “perfect
boyfriend material” you’ll soon find yourself in situations that actually make
having a girlfriend who’s enormously invested in you, an absolute guarantee.

You see, this takes all of the
pressure off of you. You don’t have to worry about impressing a woman to make
her want you. Even if you’re already dating a woman, you don’t have to work so
hard just to make her happy.

When you focus on becoming better boyfriend material, a
good woman will do whatever she can to ensure that your eyes stay fixed on her.
I can promise you that.

This is the beginning of relationship management, because
it takes two people to start a relationship. If you give a woman all you’ve got
right out of the gate, there’s a high chance that she’ll lose interest in you
because she’ll feel as if she doesn’t have to work for your love and affection.

Trust me on this; she wants to feel as if she’s earned your attention and affection in
the long-run. This is how enjoyable relationships
begin, because we as human beings will take for granted that which we did not
work for.

Relationships are give and take; they are not just give
OR take. So if your goal is to get a great girlfriend, you need to keep her
interested in you by giving her the gift of chasing you just as much as you
chase her. Trust me, she’ll love you for it in the end.

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